Wasted emotions {Perhaps not so wasted}

Over oatmeal, a chocolate turnover, a breakfast sandwich, and, of course, cups of coffee yesterday morning, a dear friend and I discussed a plethora of emotions – specifically those that many would deem wasted.

Yearning for a baby. Hoping again and again for conception. Again and again tasting disappointment. 

Yearning for a husband. Hoping again and again that Prince Charming had arrived. Again and again realizing that he was not a part of this fairy tale.

Yearning for physical healing. Hoping again and again that bodies full of sickness and pain would awaken to perfection here on Earth. Again and again realizing that sometimes wholeness is reserved for our Heavenly forms. 

Yearning for justice. Hoping again and again that those that cause havoc and pain would meet their just rewards. Again and again realizing that we know not the day nor the hour when the Lord’s work will be accomplished. 

Yearning for family reconciliation. Hoping again and again for best friends and dear confidants to emerge from the ashes of broken relationships. Again and again realizing that we are all human, broken, barely capable of love. 

We chastise ourselves for throwing away time and energy, longing for these dreams to come true. We berate ourselves for wasting emotions, for throwing ourselves into something that was not to be.

I think we have it all wrong.

We were made to hope, to invest our emotions fully. We were made in the image of the Creator God who breathed His life – His emotional, passionate, determined life – into each one of us.

We are broken when we do not yearn – again and again. We are broken when we do not hope – again and again. We are broken when we do not dream – again and again.

Brokenness is not defined by continual disappointment, but rather characterized by a the lack of desire, the incapability of love, the disappearance of future dreams and plans. At least, this is how I see it.

I have a Savior who was broken that I might be healed. This healing did not have a catch nor an expiration date. He not only faced continual disappointment, but also laid down His desires for me.

In His image, I can hope again and again. I can dream again and again. 

Are some of my emotions misplaced? Perhaps. Is my timing all wrong sometimes? Definitely. But does that change the nature of the King I was created to reflect, the King of Peace and Redemption? Absolutely not.

Isaiah 59:19 (AMP) does not mince words: “So [as the result of the Messiah’s intervention] they shall [reverently] fear the name of the Lord from the west, and His glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard against him and put him to flight [for He will come like a rushing stream which the breath of the Lord drives].”

When the Stealer and Destroyer of Hopes and Dreams rushes in to kill desire, our Messiah rushes in to apply His redeeming blood to the wounds and gashes of His fallen, while routing the Enemy in his tracks.

Again and again.